#chrissy cunningham headcanon

[rose-n-gunses]

Okay the post about that one guy who got high and thought it was night because it was dark so he sneaks into the kitchen and really slowly makes a bowl of cereal but he actually had on sunglasses and his parents were sitting at the table eating dinner.

Eddie who comes out of his room, aviators on and reeking of weed, and tiptoes down the hall, slowly opens the cabinet, makes a sandwich and a bowl of honeycombs, and creeps back to his room. Chrissy and Wayne are sitting at the table watching the whole thing go down. They both stopped eating to watch when he came into the room, both confused and then trying not to laugh. They say nothing until his door closes again and Wayne says "Butter?" And Chrissy giggles and says "yes please"

[pollenallergie]

I feel like, deep down, Chrissy is a massive nerd, but only in secret and usually only about really niche stuff. For example, she could tell you all about ancient Mississippian burial practices, but Star Wars? Meh, that’s never really been her thing. Chrissy knows everything there is to possibly know about famous historical women like Julie d’Aubigny (read: famous historical sapphics), but she doesn’t know the difference between Marvel and DC superheroes. She can tell you exactly what dyes were rare and regarded as being “luxurious” and “extravagant” during the Qin dynasty. However, Chrissy hates playing video games because all the bright colors and flashing graphics make her dizzy. Honestly, the most cliché nerdy thing she’s into is LOTR. Chrissy’s a secret Tolkien fanatic (extra emphasis on secret), she spent her entire childhood dreaming about being an elven princess… and also marrying an elven princess…

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Jason was Chrissy's first boyfriend but not her first relationship. What happens at cheer camp stays at cheer camp. Although she's kind of sad that it had to stay at cheer camp.

[wynnyfryd]

@messessentialist told me her friend called to rant about spotting an “upsettingly beautiful boy in a tj maxx” and i vomited 1200 words about it, enjoy

—

fic idea: chrissy and eddie work together at tj maxx. one afternoon a guy comes in who’s so hot that it kinda just pisses eddie off? bc like, who does this gorgeous asshole think he is??? coming in here and popping his hip at eddie’s counter, like, does he even know how uncomfortable it is to start chubbin’ up in skinny jeans?? that shit chafes!

so eddie gets all flustered and responds by getting an attitude with the guy because he has zero chill (and also because the dude’s iced coffee is sweating a ring all over eddie’s counter, and so help him if his manager gets on his ass one more time about keeping his station tidy—)

“did you need help finding anything else today?” eddie sneers. “coasters, perhaps?”

upsettingly hot guy looks confused for a second before he follows eddie’s pointed glance at the plastic starbucks cup leaving a cold puddle on the laminate, and then he sneers right back; adjusts the ray bans nestled in his perfect honey brown hair and looks eddie up and down — long, slow, one eyebrow lifting in subtle elitist disapproval.

“what?” he snorts, “hot topic wasn’t hiring?”

oh, fuck you very much!

so eddie’s all ‘nemesis acquired’ and holds the biggest grudge of all time. makes a sworn enemy and a boogeyman out of the guy, turns him into urban legend, starts blaming the Upsettingly Beautiful Man for every little thing that goes wrong in his life — at work, at home, at band practice; no place is safe from the dreaded UBM.

“he’s not a fucking cryptid!” gareth snaps one day at rehearsal, chucking a drumstick at eddie’s head. “just track him down and bone already so you can shut the hell up!”

“wouldn’t he just talk about him more after they have sex?” jeff wonders, to which gareth narrows his eyes and raises his second drumstick as a threat.

meanwhile, eddie’s cute coworker chrissy (who he’s become surprisingly good friends with, to the point of referring to her as his work wife) gets a girlfriend. robin’s sooooo pretty, and soooo nice, and sooooo tall, eddie, did you know how tall she is?

yes, chrissy, he’s supremely aware of a stranger’s five-foot-eight-and-a-half stature now, thank you.

“you have to meet her!” chrissy gushes, bouncing up onto her toes.

eddie hangs another shirt. “you have to chill.”

“hey!” she pouts, pixar princess cute. “you wouldn’t tell the sun to dull its shine, would you?”

“i mean, i would, but i doubt the giant ball of plasma cares what i want.”

“okay, whatever, eeyore.” she rolls her eyes but she physically can’t stop beaming even as she does it, and eddie finds himself melting under it — some sort of radiant area attack coming from the apples of this girl’s cheeks, he swears, because the next thing he knows he’s agreeing to go to rando new girlfriend’s housewarming party this weekend so he can meet her properly.

only he doesn’t get to meet her properly, because when he shows up to the party the two bedroom apartment is packed with people he’s never seen, and it’s loud as fuck in here and he’s sweating through his leather from the six flights of stairs he had to climb to reach the place, so he steps through a sliding door out to the balcony and lo and behold, if it isn’t Upsettingly Beautiful Man looking upsettingly beautiful — positively fucking divine, actually, the last wisps of fuchsia sunset catching the gold streaks in his hair and dotting the tip of his flawless nose. Seriously, does this dude have any flaws? A scar, a birthmark, an unsightly ingrown hair? Eddie can’t even see a single blackhead for fuck’s sake.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer” the dude mutters, turning to look at him, and, “oh, my god, you again?”

“uh.”

“i’ve got a fucking coaster this time,” the guy says, lifting his solo cup and giving it a little shake to point out the cork round sitting underneath it, “so if that’s what you came out here to berate me for, then you’ll have to think of something else.”

“uh,” eddie says again, because he has no idea what brought this on but he’s pretty sure it has shit all to do with him, and pretty boy’s really working himself up now, arms moving in sharp gestures as he paces back and forth on the short balcony.

“not that it even matters if i didn’t have a coaster, because this is my house! i can do what i want with my own fucking stuff in my own fucking apartment, nance, i don’t— uh…”

pretty boy’s face blossoms rose petal red, a heavy blush creeping up his jawline as he catches himself mid rant and folds in on himself, crossing his arms over his chest with a sheepish expression.

eddie’s always had a thing for shepherding.

“i’m listening,” he says, popping a cigarette in his mouth and holding the pack out in offering. “if you care to vent.”

the guy — steve, eddie finds out — tells him all about his controlling ex-girlfriend as they work their way through two cigarettes each, the sun slipping away to reveal a full topaz moon, big and low and close, ripe citrus bending the branch of a tree. nance was a real piece of work by the sounds of it, and eddie feels like an absolute shit for the way he treated steve, who had apparently just gotten dumped the night before they met and had been out shopping for a “please take me back” present.

“like that was ever gonna work,” steve mumbles, ashing over the railing. “pathetic. anyway, sorry i was rude to you that day or whatever.”

“you weren’t.”

“nah, i was.” steve shifts his weight, knocks their shoulders together. “not that you didn’t deserve it.”

“yeahhhh,” eddie agrees, cringing at himself. “sorry.”

“all good. so what’s your story then, huh? who pissed in your cheerios that day?”

eddie blames the alcohol fumes wafting from steve’s cup — a justification that makes perfect sense and would totally hold up in a court of law — for what he says next.

“honestly? you.”

steve’s face is so cartoonishly offended that eddie busts out laughing, eyes crinkling, head thrown back.

“oh, so you’re just an asshole,” steve nods sagely. “first cute guy to flirt with me in six weeks is a lunatic. love that for me.”

“no, i—” eddie laughs, “okay, we’re coming back to how you think i’m cute, but i just meant, uh-”

oh, fuck it. eddie’s never been good at holding his cards close to the chest. more of a 52 pick up kinda guy, historically, and why change now?

“you were so gorgeous it, like, genuinely upset me for a second,” eddie admits, running his tongue over his lip. he stubs out his cigarette; turns to look right at steve. “like, uh, like cuteness aggression or some shit.”

steve mirrors his posture, leaning an elbow on the railing, nearly chest to chest. “so you are crazy,” he smiles.

“that’s correct.” eddie swallows.

steve moves in to close the gap. “good crazy?”

“fun crazy, so i’m told.”

“i’m gonna kiss you if that’s cool.”

“very”

the kiss tastes like ripe citrus

[mangoslam]

Nancy “fuck it” Wheeler

Steve “fuck my life” Harrington

Robin “well fuck” Buckley

Jonathan “fuck this” Byers

Billy “fuck me” Hargrove

Eddie “fuck off” Munson

Chrissy “oh fuck” Cunningham

Dustin “fuuuuccck” Henderson

Will “fuck fuck fuck” Byers

Mike “fuck everything” Wheeler

Max “fuck you” Mayfield

Lucas “for fucks sake” Sinclair

Erica “what the fuck” Sinclair

Based on this post

[little-annie]

Thanks to the @strangerthingswritersguild for the prompt and @eyesofshinigami for the brain worm 🪱 our conversation created.

Did you know in fan fic writing the term Rubber Ducking refers to bouncing ideas off of each other/ brainstorming with friends? Well I didn't. I thought it was a sex thing.

From that, this idea was born.

Rubber Ducking | M | 873 WC | Steddie | Buckingham

It was a cold February night when the first sighting occurred. The air in the apartment had felt different. Charged with an electricity Robin couldn't explain.

Something was happening. And at first she had thought it was an anomaly, then maybe a coincidence. 

But then it kept happening. 

Those black empty eyes met hers and mere hours later the sound of the city was lost to the wails of the night.

It sounded like torture.

Like the stripping of flesh and bones.

But even more horrifically, Robin learned it was anything but.

Sure, there was flesh and bone, but how Steve apparently getting absolutely railed by Eddie in the next room over had any connection to the rubber ducky that ended up on the living room coffee table every so often, Robin hadn't the slightest clue.

She just knew that unfortunately there had to be one.

A few weeks later, sitting at the breakfast bar and trying to ignore the low hanging neckline of Chrissy's already frankly obscene tank top, Robin notices the presence of yet another rubber ducky.

This one donning a Sailor's hat and suit. Similar to the one she remembers her and Steve wearing in their days at Scoops Ahoy. 

Not twenty minutes later she's met with Eddie asking if she knows where Steve hid his old uniform. Regrettably she tells him, and that night goes to bed taking precautionary measures with foam plugs in her ears.

The following week there's a light blue ducky on the coffee table instead, then a grey ducky the week after. Then after a few more weeks there's what appears to be a leather daddy ducky. 

Sometimes in between there's a plain normal rubber ducky.

“You figure it out yet?” Chrissy asks one evening, plopping down onto the couch next to Robin and setting her feet in her lap.

God what she wouldn't do for this girl and her polka dot pink fuzzy socks.

Looking over at the boys who are now apparently disgustingly in love, and currently trading lazy kisses and giggles back and forth in the loveseat, Robin sighs, “Unfortunately.”

She nearly had the code cracked before a drunken Steve had told her what it all meant.

Original Ducky = Someone is horny.

Sailor Ducky (Sir Butterscotch) = Someone wears the Scoops uniform. 

Light Blue (Richard) = Someone wants to give / receive head.

Grey (Bari) = Someone wants to be tied up/do the tying up.

Leather Daddy = "You really don't want to know Robin.”

So essentially flagging, she figures, but with various types of rubber duckys, which is horrific in its own way.

Now when one of them is feeling it, they pick a rubber ducky of their choosing and leave it out on the coffee table as a subtle way of asking for the represented attention.

“Sex Duck,” Robin sighs, leaning her head against the back of the couch, turning to look at Chrissy, “They have a fucking sex duck.”

“Like that show with the sex mug?”

“Like the show with the sex mug.” She answers flatly 

Sure seeing the ducks at home was bad enough, but when they started appearing in the wild it was so much worse.

First in Steve's car on the dash, then Eddie's van, then one day at work when Eddie came sauntering in and pulled a light blue ducky from his pocket, tossing it in Steve's direction before walking off towards the employees only bathroom.

They think they're subtle, but really they're not.

It's just another Tuesday evening when a new ducky makes its way onto the coffee table in the living room. Traditional like the first, but donning a pink bow and black painted on lashes. Feminine. Cute.

Like a game, Robin's began trying to decipher the meaning behind every duck before Steve inevitably tells her. It helps her cope with the trauma. 

This one though, makes her wonder. 

Sitting on the couch staring probably a little too intensely at the newest addition to the boys collection, Robin hardly notices when Steve plops down beside her.

She startles when she notices him, his voice catching her off guard. “Whatcha doing?”

“Trying to figure out what kink of yours this little lady represents.”

Steve hums and Eddie joins them shortly after, settling in the rocking chair across from them, giving the ducky the same odd look Robin had been moments ago.

“Whatcha doing, Buck?”

She gestures to the duck, “Figuring out her deal.”

Feminization maybe?

“Chrissy?” Eddie asks

“What?” Robin looks up from those cute long lashed eyes, “No. Your duck.”

Next to her Steve huffs a laugh, crossing his arms and leaning back against the couch. “Not our ducky, Rob.”

What?

“Course it is.”

“Not our ducky, Babe.” Eddie repeats Steve's words.

It has to be. “Well it's not mine.” Robin grumbles.

“No, no Rob it's not.” Steve nudges Robin's knee with his, “Maybe it's meant for you though.”

No.

No?

Looking far too excited, Eddie smirks, “Chris is in her room isn't she?”

Well… it… it wouldn't hurt to check would it? Maybe the boys are just teasing her, playing a game. But on the off chance they're not…

“You gonna go get your girl, Rob?”

Jesus Christ, she's going to, isn't she?

[lipstickmarks]

I don’t think eddie and chrissy would have kids right away. In fact, I think it would be SEVERAL years before they had kids.

Let’s be real, Chrissy probably faced pressure to get married and have kids right after high school/college and she doesn’t have that pressure with eddie.

so after they move out of hawkins, live in new york, and become famous, they just coast and enjoy being free but most of all being together

they didn’t plan to have kids but they also didn’t plan to not have kids, they were just so focused on making it out, then their relationship and respective careers and just living life

and then they finally have a surpriseish kid at 32, after they’ve gotten to have 14 years to themselves and are finally healed enough and content enough to bring life into the world

and they would’ve been 32 in 2000 which means their baby would be 1 year old by the time LOTR premiered in theatres which lines up with this tik tok

anyway they both become PARENTS™️ after that and are totally infatuated with their little family

[hello-sweetheart]

Catnip pt. 1- Steddie Fic Draft | Meet Cute AU

Steve and Eddie aren’t even neighbors, they barely live within the same region as it is, and have been completely unaware of each other until

Steve and Eddie have unknowingly been coparenting the same cat. She showed up to Steve’s house one day a few years ago and he’s fed her enough that he no longer considers her a stray, but as his cat that takes up the very serious job of protecting his vegetable garden from thieves. He leaves his kitchen window open when he’s home so she may come and go as she please. Never sees her in the evening or night, but ‘cats are like nocturnal or whatever, right?’ She’s probably out hunting doing her due diligence.

In a neighboring town, Eddie has also been caring for a ‘stray cat’ for a few years that she really isn’t a stray cat anymore tbh. She has her own little doggy door and everything. Watches American football with Wayne and sleeps on Eddie’s dirty laundry pile. Sure, he doesn’t see her for most of the day until the evening, but who is he as a man to try and police her independence. Eddie never questions where she she gets the tea towels she brings home to add to her laundry pile nest, he ain’t no snitch.

One day, Eddie is greeting her, stroking her back, and notices a stitched up wound on her back. He freaks out like omg??? where did her highness get injured? Who looked after her? wtf? He goes to the vet but the vet is tight-lipped about it as he can’t really disclose customer information.

So, Eddie makes a HiveMind community post to try and find the good citizen that helped his baby and properly thank them.

E. Son of Munson🗡️🎲: Looking for the good citizen who found Little-Lady injured and took her to vet for stitches! Thank you so much, pls let me know how I can repay you. Or message me if you have any information on this local hero <3

[Attachment]

[❤️ 36 likes 💬 3 comments]

Gareth H.: Glad she’s ok dude! Can’t lose our favorite groupie 🤘

Steve Harrington: Little Lady? Um, I’m pretty sure that’s my cat?? Her names Chai… Pls accept my DM

[Replies to Steve Harrington]

Chrissy Cunningham ❤️‍🩹🧷: Oh no… 😥

[blushweddinggowns]

There is something so fun about the idea of Chrissy noticing Robin first and crushing hard.

Like when she's supposed to be looking at the court for basketball games she's always sneaking glances at the band, eyes always stopping at the gangly girl with the pretty smile, Robin none the wiser.

When the cheerleading squad and band members have to share a bus for tournaments, she always sits next to her, even if Robin never notices because she falls asleep thirty seconds after the bus is in motion.

And Chrissy can't stop looking at her. And she notices more and more, like her freckles and how her eyes sparkle, and she just can't stop thinking about her.

Yeah, I love that shit.

[cunninghamchrissie]

you know how a lot of ppl can’t wait to get home and take off their bra?

eddie is like that, except he’s not the one that wears it

his favorite time of day is when chrissy comes home from work and gets into her lounge clothes, letting out a little sigh when she finally gets her bra off, and that’s eddie’s cue to get up from wherever he is to go to her and massage her breasts

it’s not even sexual, even though sometimes it does lead to that and he’s never not gonna be turned on by her breasts, but it’s just genuinely comforting to him

they’re just the perfect size and they fit so well in his hands and chrissy lets out these little breaths and whines because it feels so good and her bra was so uncomfortable, how could eddie not be obsessed w this routine of theirs?

[rose-n-gunses]

Hellcheer are the moon and sun btw just not in the ways you might think

🌙 Chrissy is the moon, actually, a part of her always concealed to everyone but the sun, waxing and waning with the seasons - some days she's fully there and some days she's the smallest version of herself and some days she's not there at all (but she always comes back). She's glowing and beautiful and everyone loves her for it but it's another entity's light she's reflecting (she's still learning how to shine on her own). People love her for her calm nature but forget that she also has the strength to create tides that can destroy you with a single wave.

☀️ Eddie is the sun, burning hot and bright and loud. People frequently find him hard to handle for long periods of time (or at all) and generally desire some degree of separation. He has his ups and downs but he's always there, and people silently fear the distant implosion they feel is inevitable. He's intense and relentless, yes, but people also lose sight of the fact that he's also nurturing and warm. When he's mellowed out he's thoughtful and caring. He inspires and gives light and life to those that truly appreciate him, brings excitement and energy to his surroundings.

(So it's a good thing that Chrissy's favorite season is summer and Eddie's always been a night owl)

[pollenallergie]

Chrissy doing your makeup and then immediately smudging your lipstick by kissing you. Send tweet.

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Reading Lord of the Rings for the first time in a long time. . .does anyone else think Eddie and Chrissy are a little bit Tom Bombadil and Goldberry coded? I can just imagine Eddie introducing Chrissy to the works of Tolkien, and she just falls in love with it. She likes to draw, too, so I can see her drawing her and Eddie as Tom and Goldberry. She loves drawing Goldberry and her outfits. She takes it a step further and starts to learn how to make outfits. And if that's how she loves to make clothes, then so be it. . .the quirkier, the better.

[gregre369]

I have a Terrible head cannon that Steve’s parents were killed season 3 by the mind flayer.

But Steve doesn’t know this because they’re almost never home and he didn’t realize they had been in town when it happened.

[mangoslam]

top hellcheer AU's

part 2

[tired--fangirl]

Greek God parents for stranger things characters hcs:

Nancy: Athena (or Artemis)

Robin: Hephaestus

Steve: Aphrodite

Eddie: Dionysus

Jonathan: Apollo

Argyle: Dionysus

Chrissy: Aphrodite

Dustin: Hephaestus

Will: Apollo

Mike: Athena

Lucas: Zeus

Max: Ares

Billy: Ares

El: Hades